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Kamis, 12 September 2013

~10 Mistakes a Husband to wife~

 

Husband is reliant life of a wife ... the husband is friend, father, brother, leader, successor, motivator, ust, protector, educator to his wife and children in a family institution. husband is the best example and role model for wives and children, in order to birth a family in harmony and blessings of Allah Taala  ... In search of the bow to form themselves into a man who holds a pious husband ideal husband, let both our biological excerpts next.

Integrity of a household is influenced by the good leadership of a husband (as head of the family) in fostering family. Over again is ATTITUDE & behavior in hanging out with his wife. MAIN spouses as supporting a household, when the building was damaged household ... will collapse. This relationship was always supposed to be due in the case with respect to their rights and responsibilities of each. For a husband / wife should fulfill mutual obligations after that should get what he deserves.

If we look at the reality in society, 2 husbands attitudes which contradict each other in serving their wives, this is the attitude that needs to grab the attention if not equally cause problems that led to a divorce.

First, the husband who belittle his wife, who squandered their rights and perform a variety of errors associated with the right of his wife....

Second, let go of control over the wife's husband and set him free so alone (in the sense of the word. REMOVABLE HAND)
Allah says EMQ within: 34 is intended:
"Men are the leaders of women, because Allah has preferred some of them (men over others (women) and they (men) spend out of their property. Therefore, it is women who are pious, God is faithful anymore maintain themselves when her husband was not there, because God has kept (them). ladies do you fear disobedience, admonish them and then send them to their beds and beat them. then if they menaatimu, then do not seek - find the way for troubling. Verily Allah is Most High, Most Great "~
The following are 10 (ten) ERRORS husband is mostly done, all of which are divided in two mistaken attitudes above:
1. Religion does not teach the law to the wife and the LAW
* Many we find the wives do not know how to correct prayers, legal menstruation and childbirth, act / behave towards her husband is not Sharai & not educate children in Islam. Some even fall into various types of shirk. The concern of a wife just how to cook & serve certain foods, how to dress up pretty and so on. No other all because of the demands of her husband, while the problem RELIGION, especially his worship was never asked by the husband.
Yet God said that meant:
"O people - people who believe, keep yourself and your family from the fire whose fuel is men and stones, guardian angel - angel rough, hard & not disobey Allah in what are instructed that to them and always do what they're told "~ {Surah At Tahrim: 6}
Then the husband asked not to occasionally ignore it, because it will all be held accountable. Really ought to teach religion to his wife, by themselves or through intermediaries. Among other things to do; presented books about Islam and its laws and talking together, cassette or CD lectures, took his wife to attend a distinguished panel of SCIENCE delivered by people who are knowledgeable, etc. .. (the most practical .. invite prayer at home or congregational mosque for example).
2. Looking deficiencies and errors like wife
In a hadith narrated by Bukhari and Muslim, the Prophet Muhammad forbade men who travel for a long time, go home to their families at night, because it was feared would have various shortcomings wife and blamed his wife. Even husbands are asked to be patient and refrain from the shortcoming that there is his wife, also when the wife does not perform its obligations. For the husband also has shortcomings and reproaches as saying of the Prophet:
"Do not be a faithful husband who hates his wife were faithful. If she did not like her character, she certainly mengikhlaskan another character from her "~ {HR. Muslim}
3. Give punishment according to the error's wife. This includes forms of injustice to the wife, among others, namely:
(A) Using a punch in the early stages {letters refer penalty notice within QS An Nisa: 34}
(B) expel his wife from the truth without Sharai {Surah Ath THALAQ: 1}
(C) hitting the face, denounced and insulted
(D) And finally dared to Rate Domestic Violence (domestic violence) that the higher
In as-Sunan and al-Musnan of Mu'awiya ibn al-Qushayri Haidah bahawa he said: "O Messenger of Allah, whether RIGHTS wife over her husband? The Prophet SAW said
"You shall eat whatever you feed him, give him clothes if you get dressed, do not hit the face, not menjelek2kan and not beat up (boycott) except at the house" ~ {HR. Ibn Majah validated by Shaykh Albani}
4. Deceitful in giving maintenance to wife
"Mothers shall suckle their children for two full years, that is for those who want to improve penyusuannya. And the obligation to feed and clothe fathers to mothers in a way that ma'ruf. Someone not in overload but according to its ability levels. No mother because of her sufferings and a father for her child and thus obliged warispun. If they want to wean (before 2 yrs) with both pleasure and deliberation, there is no blame on either of them. And if you want your son disusukan by others, it is no sin for you if you give payment according to the worth. Bertaqwalah in Allah and know that Allah is All-Seer of what you do "~ {Surah Al Baqarah: 233}
RIGHT wife earns a living, because she had allowed her husband to her fun, she has to obey her husband, lived in his house, nurture and educate their children. And if the wife finds her husband's deceitful in giving a living, hunks, does not provide a living to him without any justification Sharai, then he should take possession of the husband to provide for its needs by doing good (no exaggeration) even without her husband's knowledge.
"If a Muslim put out a living for his family while he expects his reward, then living it is charity for him" ~ {HR muttafaq 'alaih}
5. Attitudes hard, rough, not soft on wife
Messenger of Allah said: "The most perfect believers are the most depraved kind. And the best - most of you are well on his wives' ~ {HR. at-Tirmidhi, validated by Shaykh Albani}
So the moral good husband to his wife ought to be gentle and avoid rude attitude.
6. Vanity husbands help their wives in household affairs
This is a mistake that most affects the husbands. Though most men MAIN ie Prophet Muhammad did not hesitate to always help his wife work.
When Aisha asked about what the Messenger of Allah in his house, he replied:
"He helped work his wife and when it comes time in prayer, then Beliaupun out to prayer" ~ {HR. Bukhari}
7. Secrets and disgrace his wife spreading
"Verily among the worst position in the sight of Allah on the Day of Judgment is the one who screwed his wife and his wife menggaulinya then he spread the secrets of his wife" ~ {HR. Muslim}
in this Hadith is forbidden for a man to spread what happened between him and especially his wife in bed. Also forbidden to mention the details, and what happened to his wife in the form of another word or deed.
8. Attitude in the rush to divorce wife
O noble husband,
Indeed the relationship between you and your wife is a strong relationship again EMQ holy {21} by karenanyaIslam think divorce is a big deal that should not be underestimated because the divorce will be dragged to the damage, chaotic balaunya children's education and so on. And the words should divorce / talaq was not used as a joke / toy. Because the Prophet has said:
"There are 3 things that seriousness and jokes equally seriously considered, namely: NIKAH, talaq (divorce) and REFER" ~ {HR. Abu Dawud, at-Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah, rated "hasan" by Shaykh al-Albani}
Indeed, disputes between husband and wife often happens sometimes to lead to divorce. But divorce is not to be used as a first step in resolving this dispute. Even should try different ways to solve it, because it will most likely be a lot of regret later posed in the future ..
9. Polygamy without regard to the provisions of Shari'ah
Married for the second time, the third and fourth times is one of the things that are God syariatkan. But to note here that the majority of people who want to apply this law / have applied not noticed that not fulfill kewajipan attitude and responsibility towards his wife. Especially the first wife and her children.
"Then if you fear you will not be able to do justice, then (kawinlah) a course" ~ {Surah An Nisa: 3}
This attitude is JUSTICE Allah has commanded. It is true that polygamy is Islamic law, but if someone is not able to execute it properly and do not meet the terms or can not take the responsibility, it menjuruskan damage to a home, destroy the children and family issues and also adds to the community. Then fikirkanlah consequently his case and consider carefully before entering into it.
10. Weak jealousy
The husband let the elegance, beauty and beauty and his wife enjoyed exhibited by people crowded. He let his wife out of the house to show her nakedness while, let hang out with other men. Even some PROUD partly because it has a beautiful wife who may be enjoyed 'the view' most people. Whereas women in the eyes of Islam is being VERY noble, so beautiful and its beauty reserved only reserved for her husband alone or occasionally not di'jaja 'go-anywhere ..
A husband who has jealousy towards his wife would not let his wife shook hands with another man who is NOT a mahram.
"Inserted in the head of a man with an iron needle is better than he touched a woman who is not lawful for him" ~ {see the ash-Shahihah: 226}
A husband who has jealousy towards his wife, he will pay attention to the word of the Prophet Muhammad:
"Do not go to meet women" and an Ansar said, "O Messenger of Allah, what al-hamw (relatives of the husband)?" He said, "Al-hamwu is death" ~ {HR. Muttafaq'alaih}
Note also the threat of the Prophet Muhammad to the man who has no jealousy toward family (wife):
"Three groups that Allah SWT will not see them on the Day of Resurrection namely someone who disobedient to his parents, women who resemble men and ad-dayyuts" ~ {HR. An-Nasa'i rated 'hasan' by sheikh Albani, see ash-Shahihah: 674}
And ad-dayyuts (dayus) is MAN who has no jealousy toward his family.
May be useful for all of us .. God willing
Allaah knows bishaawwab


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